Embracing complex feelings
needed medicine for our times
On Saturday morning I found myself bawling in the car to the Greatest Showman soundtrack, overcome with emotion for both the joy and devastation that is part of the human existence.
Last week activated on a deeper level a truth that I have been feeling for some time now: at this time on the planet we are being asked to stretch our capacity for feeling.
We are being asked to hold the joy with the grief, to not let one cancel out the other, but to honor the spectrum of feelings that are part of the human experience. To acknowledge that there are many facets of reality, and even of our own realities, that exist in any moment.
Maybe this bears no explanation, but let me share a little more what I was thinking about in that moment in the car, and how I think this is actually *key* to our evolution as a species (as well as our thriving as leaders, healers and mothers).
If you're not familiar, the Greatest Showman is a movie musical sharing the life of P.T. Barnum and his creation of the Barnum & Bailey Circus. Of course, it's heavily fictionalized, but the story has always resonated deeply with me: there's a man who has a dream for a wildly different reality, one where we celebrate our gifts and our uniqueness, and where we dare to live outside the confines of societal expectations and norms.
The music especially pulls at my heart strings, and I often find myself listening to it when I am in the process of birthing something that feels big and wild and new.
So there I was Saturday morning, driving to the farmer's market with my son in the back seat, feeling that message of dreaming big vibrating thru my cells. It was a gorgeous day, and as I often do when looking at my son, I was feeling waves of gratitude for this beautiful family and life we have.
In the very same moment I was reminded of the devastating events of the week: the innocent hostages that were executed by Hamas, the school shooting in Georgia, and (more personally) news that a loved one was closer to making their transition to the other side.
And then the tears came. Tears of joy mixed with tears of grief. Tears of loss and tears of hope. Tears of knowing the incredible life that we are giving our son, and tears of desiring a different future for him.
It's easy to avoid complex feelings - to dismiss the joy in fear that it diminishes the realness of the grief, or similarly to bypass the grief by looking only at the bright side or for a silver lining.
It's natural to try to put events and actions into boxes - this is good, this is bad, this is wrong, this is right.
What's harder, but I think a deep need on our planet at this time, is holding space for the spectrum, for embracing nuance, for not needing someone or something else to be wrong in order for you (or how you are feeling) to be right.
As someone who sees very clearly why things are not working (and often before other people do), it can be overwhelming to witness all the problems of the world and still carry on. To hold hope for the future, to run a business, to have children.
It can be overwhelming when we *just* look at the problems (in the world, in our lives, in our businesses) without also seeing all the good, all the joy, all the progress, all the life.
And so, in this time when so much is breaking down, when so much is shifting, when so much is being revealed as not working, we must stretch our capacity for being with it all.
Not only is emotional depth and range how we will get through these times, it is also how we create a supportive space for the emerging reality. The old paradigm is crumbling, and what's arising in it's place requires us to embrace complexity, nuance and an understanding that multiple truths (even those that feel at odds with one another) can exist at once.
Whether or not you see yourself as a pioneer of a new reality, the message is simple and it is this:
Your grief doesn't have to overshadow your joy
And your joy doesn't have to betray your grief.
You can (and get to be) it all. May this reminder bring you peace in the complex times now and ahead (yes, it's eclipse season, baby!).
Big hugs,
Emily
PS. Really resonating with this message but not sure how it applies to you or your work? 80% of the time it's not a lack of strategy that holds us back in business, it's an emotional, energetic or spiritual block. A belief system, a feeling we are not feeling, an inherited pattern we are unknowingly playing out.
Later this week I'm going to be announcing a new workshop where we'll have an opportunity to dive into these blocks together - to see them and hold space for them, and then move them so that you can get on doing your important work in the world, reaching more people and making more of the impact that you dream of making. Stay tuned!