I Don't Want it That Way
What I forgot about money & success, even as a business coach of 11+ years
Over 11 years ago I left my corporate accounting role for three primary reasons:
I wanted to do work that I loved.
I wanted to be lit up by my career, to feel like I was truly living in my purpose. I was good at my role as an auditor - I succeeded by my company’s standards, but was I passionate about it? Did I see myself doing this when I was 40, 50, 60 years old? Definitely not.
I wanted my work to complement a healthy lifestyle, not compete with it.
At the time I was working 40-60 hrs / week sitting inside at a desk in a high stress environment. I’d wake up at 5AM to run and go to yoga on the weekends, but I couldn’t help but feel this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. That I shouldn’t have to do so much to balance out all those hours at the office.
I wanted to be able to stay at home with my future kids.
Even a decade before the first of those children were even conceived, a decade before working remote was as mainstream as it is right now, I knew I wanted work that was flexible and in alignment with how I wanted to mother. I did not envision myself going into an office 9-5 when my children were small, and I didn’t see any women above me in the accounting firm modeling who I wanted to be when I would become a mom.
I was ambitious with a strong drive to create and provide, but unwilling to do it at the expense of my own health, dreams or values.
So on the precipice of a big promotion, I surprised everyone and quit.
That was over 11 years ago. For over a decade I have helped women and mothers create successful careers on their own terms. Businesses that don’t ask them to sacrifice their health, their family goals, or their passions for a paycheck.
And while nearly all of my clients end up having significant financial wins - their most profitable years, biggest deals, highest enrollments in their offers - like me, money is not their primary driver or indicator of success.
Like me, they want to feel lit up and inspired by their work and to feel like they are contributing to the change they wish to see in the world.
Like me, they want to have flexibility with their time. Many, but not all, of my clients are mothers or have dreams of becoming a mom. They want to be home (or home more) with their children. Many wish to homeschool, world school, or simply have the ability to volunteer in their kids classrooms on a random Wednesday.
Like me, the women I work with value their health and well-being. Many have had successful corporate jobs and big careers that have led to burn out. They know they can’t hustle and grind like they once did in their 20s.
Like me, they may feel a little like they don’t fit it - they don’t want to “just” be a stay at home mom or wife, but also feeling more and more unable to continue down the 9-5 path.
When we start working together, we don’t just look to their dreams for their career or work, we also look to their dreams for their day-to-day life.
We create a business that fits into and with that life dream, not a business that leaves life as the afterthought.
We define success, and while there’s often a financial desire, it’s not the main goal for them. What are our main goals? The quality of their health, the extent to which they feel creatively expressed and doing meaningful work, their ability to be fully present with their families and relationships.
Even though I have done this work for over a decade, have supported dozens and dozens of women in re-programming the belief that money equals success, recently I forgot this truth myself.
You can file the work I do under a number of different terms: life coach, leadership coach, business coach. Mostly I call myself a business coach for feminine leaders, because the majority of the women coming to me are directly looking for support in their careers and businesses.
Most other business coaches, even those who are deeply embodied, spiritual and feminine, still use money as a primary indicator of success.
“Every year I do this one thing that generates $300K launches”
“How I went from $6K in a year to $60K in a weekend”
“The mindset shift that took me from broke yoga teacher to millionaire entrepreneur”
Money wins are flashy, quantifiable, and justifiably important as we do still live inside capitalism, where most of us need to make money to get our needs met and provide for our families.
I don’t want to deny the reality that money matters. But for so many of us, myself included, they miss the mark of what’s most important.
Maybe it was being postpartum again, maybe it was stepping into coaching containers that really prioritize financial gains, maybe it was my own soul getting me to remember my mission and medicine on a deeper level, but sometime last year I forgot what my definition of success was.
I started to feel this pressure to perform better financially, not just for my family, but to prove the validity of my services as a business coach.
I started pushing myself to dream bigger, invest more, get in all the right rooms. And I did this: I saw the seven figure vision, I invested over $40K in mentorship & support, and attended multiple in person conferences and trainings…. all in my first six months postpartum with my second baby.
I don’t regret any of it. I want to be clear about that.
But I ended 2025 as one of my lowest cash years, with a whole lot less in our family savings and working with the fewest clients I had ever had since the beginning of my business.
Most significantly, I felt like I’d failed. I’d failed the business, I’d failed my family, I’d failed those clients who were working with me. Just because the money wasn’t there.
Meanwhile:
I had the beautiful family I had always dreamed of.
A growing local community and real, true support at home and in the business.
I had flexibility to stay at home with my littles, and to take care of my body with yoga, healthy organic food, and daily meditation. Not to mention girls nights and women’s circles.
And work, when I was doing the work of it (not just the marketing of it), that I really, truly loved and knew was changing the world. Work that nourished my soul and fueled me, not drained me.
I felt this huge dissonance. I looked around at this beautiful life and this beautiful business, but a little whisper in the back of my mind still said “It’s not enough.”
I’d be lying to you if I said I did one thing and that feeling of failure shifted overnight. That as soon as I recognized the pattern, I could move past it and made $20K the next day.
No. But there were significant actions I took that allow me to write this article to you today feeling so proud, so fulfilled and so at peace with exactly where I’m at and that has nothing to do with how much is in my bank account.
Here’s what I did, which is exactly what I do with my clients, to shift out of that scarcity mindset and re-orient to what was truly important for me so I could lead my life and business from ease, peace and pleasure:
1 - Took a significant social media break.
I’m not talking about signing off Instagram for the weekend. I was off almost all social media for a solid six months and still am not (and may never be) fully back on.
Why this works: Social media (and any media) is a constant stream of other people telling you what’s important and how you should be living your life or running your business. Even if you have boundaries it’s so easy to loose yourself in all that noise. To feel like you need to measure up or keep up, instead of stay true to yourself, your values, your pace.
2 - I also took a break from all external mentorship & trainings.
This may seem like counterintuitive advice coming from someone who’s business runs on mentorship & trainings, but I’ve always been a proponent of time off coaching and encourage my clients to take them.
Why this works: If you’re always in a training, a mastermind, a private coaching space where you are looking to someone else for guidance, it’s easy to become dependent on others and to stop looking within (especially if that container does not actively encourage you looking within).
Instead of turning to others for advice or answers, I turned to my own tools and teachings. Which leads me to my next point…
3 - Re-visited my Matriarch’s Compass.
The Matriarch’s Compass is a decision-making tool I designed to help my clients make choices in alignment with their own desires, truth and vision for the world.
I teach the full tool inside my MOTHERMIND Leadership Training, but you can read more about two of the key points - your Internal Why and your External Why - in this post.
Why this works: Without orientation to what matters to you, it’s easy to just follow someone else’s path, especially in times of growth, transition or challenge. The good news is this tool offers a super practical way to re-orient toward what matters.
Re-visiting the five points of the Matriarch’s Compass helped me remember why I’m here and what matters to me. This seems obvious but what matters to you, right now, isn’t the same as every coach on the internet, and even often not the same as the person you are currently working with as a mentor or teacher.
4 - Re-commited to my daily Personal Ritual.
This is another tool I teach inside the MOTHERMIND. The Personal Ritual is a daily personal practice essential for highly sensitive, deeply caring leaders to come back to center, alchemize big emotions and take action from a place of alignment, not fear.
Why this works: Notice that I didn’t double down on my content or sales strategy. I knew this dissonance and failure I was feeling was an inside job and it would take inner work to feel differently. Committing to 30 minute daily practice is no easy feat with two small children, I know. But if I had to pick one action that is the biggest game changer always for me, it’s this, which is why it’s one of the first tools I teach my feminine leaders inside of the MOTHERMIND.
5 - Finally, I participated in my own money manifestation course: The 30 Days of More.
Doing the practices & journal prompts from this challenge is where I finally saw how focused I had gotten on the money, and how that was and is not success for me.
Why this works: Inside the 30 Days of More we look at the beliefs & stored emotions that are taking up space in your Money Box and limiting how much money you can hold and receive.
You can say affirmations until the cows come home, but if there is a belief or stored emotion in your body telling your system money = bad (or money = shame or money = hard or money = pressure), you will block money.
When you shift the beliefs that live in your body, not only will you call in more money, you will also heal your relationship with it.
I could tell you that thru these five practices, I brought in $14,932 over the past month, but that’s only the surface of what has shifted for me.
I am more present with my kids, instead of work and sales constantly running in the background of my mind.
I’m more proud of everything we are putting out in the business - from newsletters, to the 30 Days of More challenge, to the trainings I’m leading inside of the MOTHERMIND.
I’m more at peace with exactly the income that is flowing in, knowing on a deeper level that my worth and success are not defined by how much I’m currently making.
Plus, I’m making big moves on what does matter to me. My Personal Practice. Making a magical birthday cake for my son. Writing my book (!!). My relationships and growing local community. Delivering epic value to my clients. Finally planning the event I’ve been talking about for the last 2 years.
If you only want to make more money, I’m probably not your coach.
But if you desire a coach, mentor & thought partner who helps you grow a business that fits your life and the season you are in. If you’re looking for a space where you get to talk about metrics & motherhood, spirit & strategy, and really honor the woman behind it all.
If you long for a life that feels even richer than it looks on paper….
I’m your gal, and I’ve got a special invitation for you:
We’ve decided to open two spots inside my intimate mentorship & leadership training: The MOTHERMIND Leadership Training. And when you join this month, you’ll get to gather with us in person in just a few weeks.
The MOTHERMIND Leadership Training is an intimate 1:1 mentorship experience for feminine leaders who are ready to grow a business in a way that honors both their ambition and their actual life. Together, we blend strategy, nervous system work, leadership coaching and deep personal recalibration so you can create sustainable success, meaningful wealth and a business that feels deeply aligned in this season of your life. Learn more about the MOTHERMIND and Book a Discovery Call here.
And if mentorship isn’t what you are looking for right now, but you resonated with what I shared here about success, money and remembering what’s important, I think you’ll love our somatic money challenge, the 30 Days of More.
You can explore the full 30 Days here and participate at your own pace. Binge every post and practice, or take it in more slowly. The money challenges and mindset shifts are free, upgrade to a paid membership for access to the deeper somatic practices, journal prompts and ongoing monthly live gatherings.
And finally, if what I shared here spoke to you, I’d love to hear from you.
Have you ever realized you were chasing someone else’s definition of success? What helped you come back to your own truth?
Leave a comment below and let me know!
